Tears of sadjoyness.

Just a few minutes away from my house, the doors have opened to a new In-N-Out restaurant. If you're unfamiliar with In-N-Out, it probably means you live in the ho-hum eastern part of our nation and have never experienced burgers that surpass nearly any other under the sun.

I like In-N-Out's burgers. Especially a cheese burger or Double-Double, animal style, of course. Their fries are incredible, and how can you resist dropping a lemon wedge into your Dr Pepper?

And of course, this is the sadness that surrounds my joy. I'm happy that I'm now just 5 minutes away from In-N-Out. But I'm sad because now I will actually need to be a disciplined adult and not eat there every day. That wouldn't be healthy.

So that, my friends, is the source of my tears of sadjoyness.